This has been a very tough month. It started when a neighbor from across the street died right after a successful heart surgery. There followed in quick succession, the death of a friend of more than 50 years from Parkinson’s and another friend of more than 40 years from Alzheimer’s.
The latter two deaths were expected. I had watched my friend, Francie, battle Parkinson’s for 15 years. The last two years were especially painful as she descended into a world of her own and eventually failed to respond to anyone, even her husband. She was bedridden and had to be coaxed to eat. The last time I saw her, she opened her eyes for the first time in days and smiled when my husband said what he said to her every time we met up, “Hello, Beautiful.” We rented an apartment in California from Francie and her husband in the 70s – it was a duplex, and they lived upstairs with their dogs – and we had so many adventures together. Every time we ventured out to see something in the state, we invariably ran into some problems that turned into big laughs.
My friend Billie started showing mental issues about two years ago and very rapidly declined. Within a year, she did not recognize anyone and had to live in a care facility. The last time I saw her, she did not know me, but she and I were the greatest of chocoholics, and I’d brought her a chocolate doughnut. When I asked her if she would like it, she replied, “Yes, I would like that,” even though she never spoke. Billie and I met when we sent our sons to daycare after they were born. We both worked at UNC, and I worked in her lab to learn various techniques for my own research from time to time. She was a brilliant scientist. She, her husband, my husband, and I and our children went to the beach together for a week every year for 16 years. Lots of history there.
This is a downer to write about, but I am not feeling myself lately, and getting my feelings out there helps. I write this to mourn their passing and celebrate their lives. – two warm and wonderful women who added so much to my life.
